So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
