Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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