1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
