she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
