I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
