so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
