Dual....:-)
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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