Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
