She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize