i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
