you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
