I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize