Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
drinking out of a sandbucket again
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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