I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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