He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
