Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
