hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
