like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
