He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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