I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
