We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
We need to get me chipped asap
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
