what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
