You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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