Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
