If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Little spoons don't ask big questions
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
