You're so nebulous sometimes
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
organizing the empties. That sober.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize