i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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