I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you win again, gameday.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
