She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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