found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
