erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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