like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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