we have officially lost it.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
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