He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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