He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
