You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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