When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize