I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
