We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
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