Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
