Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
