How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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