I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
