oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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