i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
