One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
