trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I am available for nakedness
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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