my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
