escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
