Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
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